Journal Update #5

Things have straightened out. But that didn’t happen last night, it happened this morning.

Last night, the same thing happened as has been happening over and over again – he asked me to wait a little bit, then became unavailable. I went to bed feeling a mixture of angry and sad. This morning I wrote (using a different channel), telling him I felt hurt and asking him to tell me what was going on, because for me, this feels awful. I got a response, explaining that he was feeling very emotional about other things and didn’t feel up to anything. I feel a lot better – because I had a chance to communicate my feelings, and then let him know that I am there to share burdens, but also that I prefer clear information, even if it is negative.

So all is… better. Not entirely good yet, but getting there. We have so much getting to know each other to do, it’s insane. We have been talking for nearly 5 months now. He has felt like somebody I’ve known for a long time right from the beginning. But on the other hand, there is so much typical behaviour and habits etc that I don’t know – because of the distance. If things work out well, the distance will be gone soon. If not, we will have to find a way to overcome this distance some other way. I am going to become an expert on long distance relationships this way – I might go into counseling 😀

On another note, I discovered that the new colleague who only joined a few weeks ago speaks the language I am learning at the moment. She has only just moved here from the city in which Mr D lives. I jumped right in and asked her whether we could help each other with learning each others’ language – and managed my first (written) chat conversation in that language today! She is also really happy – she was feeling quite lonely and culture shocked. I’m really happy about this – I will be able to practice the language and help somebody find their way around in a foreign place.

Life is good and comes with the right situations at the right time. Every time I am close to forgetting this, I get a friendly hint like this.

Today I got a few of those hints. Thank you, Life.


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